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Morning Mindset with Paul G. Markel


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Feb 28, 2018

Earning the Reward. Hot cocoa on a cold winter day. Cold beer on hot day. We understood this concept as children but far too many have lost the understanding of earning the reward.


Episode Transcription

[INTRO]

♫ Trenches by Pop Evil ♫

*Alex*

Welcome to Morning Mindset. A daily dose of practical wit and wisdom with a professional educator & trainer, Amazon best selling author, United States Marine, Television and Radio host, Paul G. Markel. Each episode will focus on positive and productive ways to strengthen your mindset, and help you improve your relationships, career goals, and overall well-being. Please welcome your host; Paul G. Markel.


*Professor Paul*

Welcome back to Morning Mindset, and I hope you’re ready to engage your brains and listen just a little bit louder this morning. Pour your coffee, or if you’re driving, hands at 10 & 2, pay attention to the road. You can listen to the sound of my voice, but watch that road in front of you, and if you’re one of those folks who listens to me on the treadmill, give me 10 more minutes *laugh*. Today we’re going to talk about Earning the Reward, hmmm… this concept was reinforced to me, or I thought about it over this last weekend.

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As I’ve mentioned, my family & I live in Wyoming, and it is cold in Wyoming. It is cold, we have snow and mountains, and sometimes I’ll get a little wild-hair and I’ll go up into the mountains, and put on some snowshoes and trudge up & down the trails with my snowshoes on. I wear the layers, and I’ve got all the warm, snuggle gear on, and I was raised in the North. I was born in Michigan, and I spent my teenage years in Ohio, so I’m fully aware of winter, and the effects of winter and going out on a cold, snowy day and so forth.

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Coming back in, something that I enjoyed this weekend, that I haven’t really enjoyed since I was a child, was trudging out in the snow, then coming back in and, ya know you take your cold gear off, and you put on your warm, fuzzy gear, whatever it happens to be. You come back in the house and sitting down in a chair, and drinking a cup of hot cocoa, and you say “Oh that’s silly Paul. I mean that’s for children.” Well is it really just for children, or is it for Humans, is it for people? You say “Well it’s just hot cocoa, you can have it any time of the day, you’re an adult. Anytime you wanted you could get it.”

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Yeah I could, but there’s something about going outside into the cold, doing whatever it is, then coming back inside and getting warm. Skiers know this, I think some people just downhill ski so they can enjoy some by the fire time, in the evening. In every ski lodge, what do they have? They have a communal fireplace, so after you’ve been out in the cold all day long you get to come in and, enjoy the reward of that hot fire, that comradery, whatever it is. How many of you have worked a really hard day out in the summer, and spent a hard day sweating? Then the afternoon, the end of the work day, someone hands you a cold beer, and you drink that cold beer.

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How good does that beer taste? You say “Ah, it tastes about the same as every other beer I’ve had.” Eeeeh, not really. That beer tastes a little bit better, why? Because you have earned the reward. Now as children we understood that, at least I hope you did. I don’t know how old all of you are, you might be a young 20-something or even a teenager. But when I was growing up, you had to Earn the Reward. Whatever it is, you had to go out and do your chores, mow the lawn, what have you. But you had to Earn the reward.

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For example when I played little league baseball, back in the mid-late 1970’s, when I was in Elementary school. In the summertime, if you won the game, if you were winners, the coaches would take you for ice cream. Right? Well we only got ice cream when we won. *Gasp* You’re like “That’s mean, that’s not nice. Etc.” No, we- you’re like “Well that’s just silly. It’s just ice cream, and every kid should get ice cream. No child should ever be denied ice cream.” But it was more than just a treat, it was more than just ice cream.

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When I was young the rules were- and you’re like “You had rules when you were a kid? Rules are restrictive and doesn’t allow kids to blossom & flourish.” No, children need structure and they need rules in their life. But when I was a kid if we played a game, and we lost, right if we lost, we didn’t get ice cream. The coaches were like “You want ice cream after the game?” “Yeah, yeah we do”, “Then Win, then work hard, then try harder than the other team.” You’re like “Wow… that’s really hardcore Paul, I can’t even imagine that in our modern world.”

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But we learned something, and I remember one time, it’s funny how you remember things as you’re older. But there was a time, where our coaches actually surprised us. We lost the game, and it was really close. I think it might have gone into extra innings or whatever, and it was heartbreaking. The coaches all gathered us together, and we all kind of felt bad because, we all tried really, really hard, and we just didn’t make it. The coaches gathered us together and said “You know what? This is the hardest we’ve seen you play, ever, and not win. You didn’t win today, but every single one of you put forth the effort. Every single one of you worked hard, so here’s what we’re going to do. We’re gonna go get ice cream.” We were all like “WOW!” and it tasted great, it felt great because they acknowledged what they did.

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Now imagine our world today, where children are raised in a world where, “Well no child should ever not get ice cream.” Yeah well, some kids are just lazy. Some kids just sit there and suck up all the good oxygen while everyone else does the work, some kids don’t even sweat. What are you teaching your children when you reward them, for nothing, when they don’t Earn the Reward? You say “Well Paul, ya know as they get older they’ll develop-” nooo. That’s not how it works, you have to learn to Earn the Reward when you’re young, and you know Earning the Reward, even something as simple as sitting down & drinking that hot cocoa.

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Something as simple as that really cold beer, at the end of a hard day. It tastes better, you feel better, because you know inside of your heart that you Earned it. You know when I was a kid growing up in Michigan, I lived in Detroit, I know of all places, and we would go out and shovel snow. When I was 10, 11, Etc years old, winter to me meant that I would be out in the cold, shoveling sidewalks & driveways. That’s what winter meant to me, and I knew it was gonna happen. I would go out and shovel our driveway, shovel the sidewalks, and I’d come back in and generally, my mom would have hot chocolate for me.

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I Earned that Reward by working, and that concept is often lost on the current generation. Sadly I think that concept has been lost, not on teenagers & Elementary school children so much today, but human beings who are in the United States who are in their 20’s. You know they were raised on No Score Soccer and it doesn’t matter what you do, everybody gets the reward, everybody gets the goodies, you don’t have to earn it. As long as you feel like you deserve it, you get it. What kind of world does that put us in? That puts us in the kind of world where we have Adults who have never actually had to Earn the Reward.

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They just expect that it’s going to be given to them. So take the time to think about your day-to-day life, think about “When was the last time you Earned the Reward”? I hope that you’re earning it every day, for those of you that are fully-grown adult human beings like myself, there is a phrase; Whiskey is a Reward for a job well done, and every once in a while, you have to appreciate something like that.

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Alright today’s show is brought to you by “Team Honey Badger; Raising Fearless Kids in a Cowardly World” and sadly we live in a cowardly world, and how do we raise children in a cowardly world? If you or someone you know has children/grandchildren, this book is a must read. It is available on Amazon as a Paperback or Kindle Version. Team Honey Badger; Raising Fearless Kids in a Cowardly World. Alright folks, that’s it. I’ll talk to you again, real soon.


[OUTRO]

♫ Trenches by Pop Evil ♫

*Alex*

Thank you for spending time with us today. To get show notes, submit a topic request, for more from your host Paul G. Markel, visit MorningMindsetPodcast.com. That’s MorningMindsetPodcast.com. Please leave a review of this podcast on your favorite podcast player, we appreciate your time & effort, and we look forward to reading your honest feedback.